Rankings (From First to Worst)
The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)
My third(!!!) theatrical viewing of this gem–all at the same theater. Placing my fandom of this Vincent Price/AIP gem on pace with that of the New Beverly Cinema, apparently.
Model Shop (1969)
I could watch local commercials of Los Angeles from this era and fawn, so Demy didn’t have to do much for me. Luckily, he didn’t; it’s a purposefully blank film.
Laughing Sinners (1931)
Gable and Crawford smolder! The Salvation Army Band…bands…together…etc., etc.
It’s also pre-code, which means you get a grubby salesman prattling on about “white mule” for the price of admission.
Dance, Fools, Dance (1931)
Takes no prisoners.
The World’s Greatest Sinner (1962)
Tim Carey had a film career. (Let that sink in.)
Pinball Summer (1980)
I admit that after my Musso + Frank’s martini plus Joysticks–part of a double at the Egyptian Theater–fatigue set in. So I probably didn’t fully absorb this one, but it was also awfully Canadian (i.e., lacking discernible purpose or sex appeal).
The Whistler (1944)
William Castle’s memo to Columbia head Harry Cohn about the opportunity to helm this film adaptation of a radio program: “It’s horrific, Mr. Cohn…Exactly what I’ve been waiting for…I’ll scare the shit out of the audience.” (Author’s multiple ellipses).
Voice of the Whistler (1945)
Just surveying the extant film evidence, you’d be hard-pressed to guess Castle was actually a happily married man.
The Monster That Challenged The World (1957)
Unlike 1957, it’s far more likely the Salton Sea is now swarming with these:
Dancing Lady (1933)
The question feels like how? As in, how does a film starring Joan Crawford, Clark Gable, Fred Astaire (making his film debut!) and The Three Stooges fail? But, jotting that down, it seems obvious the question is: Why wouldn’t it?
Alien: Covenant (2017)
I suspect that I don’t respect the auteur Ridley Scott. (No, ‘fraid I don’t love Blade Runner, though the original Alien is pretty neat until the last 15 minutes.)
Embargo. Embargoed! EMBARGO’D!